Going The Distance In A Long-distance Relationship
Nowadays, so many couples were forced in a situation where they need to keep their relationship despite of being apart. The current economic status in our country drives many to seek greener pastures on other countries, leaving a lot of spouses and fiancées struggling to keep a strong relationship with their partners. Another reason is when a partner needs to enhance himself personally by studying abroad. But thanks to our advanced technology today, there are also a reasonable number of ways for couples to be in touch with each other.
For a relationship to flourish, there are specific factors which need to be present, and the most important ones are time and presence. The element of touch that is, is almost crucial to any relationship. But what will you do if being apart for a long time is inevitable?
First thing is to re-examine your expectations, beliefs and priorities on your relationship. Ask yourself, “Will I be willing to maturely commit to this relationship even over a long-distance? Am I secured enough to invest on this kind of relationship? Will I be matured and strong enough to be faithful till the end? Am I the kind of person who can handle being alone for a long period of time? These kind of self-assessments will help you realize how dedicated you will be on this kind of set-up. Our ebooks, “From First Date to Soul Mates” and “Save My Marriage Today 1 & 2” have excellent tools you can pull out to help you do this kind of self-assessments.
After assessing yourself and deciding that you two can pull this up, start the habit of constant and open communication. At first, you can do this by openly talking about your current situation, how you can maintain togetherness despite of distance. Communication is one of the most essential factors in building a strong relationship that will last even throughout your life span.
Next is to set goals together. Give yourself time-lines which are easier to accept than just separating and leaving your relationship depending on what will just happen by chance. Clearly state how long and how far you are going to be separated. And then maybe set plans ahead of you for you to have something to look forward to. Ensure every aspect of your life before you part ways such as kids, finances, important family occasions when both of you are always present, and the unusual things that a partner should attend to in the absence of the other.
While being apart, take advantage of technology in its maximum. Try to adjust to each other’s personal ways of getting in touch. There are persons who can’t stand very long talking by phone. However, if you really want to saving your marriage you will go an extra mile even if you burn your fingers in writing by pen.
In addition to these, work on yourself while you are apart. Improve your self-esteem and well-being and then comes additional happiness to overcome the loneliness you will normally be feeling. The happiness will eventually radiate and even be felt by your absent partner. At the same time, you will bring more peace of mind in the other end of the line. Encircle yourself with friends who will boost your confidence more in the relationship rather than injecting doubts and suspicions. Good friends can be your conscience in times of temptation, your encouragement in times of doubt. You may even learn a thing or two from them about how to maintain your relationship with your significant other. And if you learn that your partner is doing the same things, having a good circle of friends away from you, do not be doubtful right away. In the face of loneliness and temptation, how the two of you handle friends and what type of friends you choose matter.
The very point of this article is about focusing on the commitment you both have established in the past. Love, above everything else, will be the enduring factor that can weather even the longest separation. Distance can be dealt with just the right kind of perspective. Being separated physically doesn’t mean being separated spiritually.
When time comes that you are permitted to be with each other’s arms physically for a short time, make your time together a special and quality one. Always spend each moment as if it will be the last. But do not exaggerate. Don’t try too hard to the point of making it a whirlwind visit. Be yourselves but be for one another. Share everything you have accomplished when you are still both alone. These special moments will add up to your bank of assurance that you two will be together forever on the right time.
Lastly, be trusting than ever. In the first place, deciding to give this relationship a try is putting trust already. Develop it to the maximum. Trust is one fruit of love that will sustain both of you throughout your long-distance relationship thus save your marriage.
Filed under: Marriage on July 23rd, 2008 | No Comments »
